This post was most recently updated on September 21st, 2020
What is a breakup?
Simply put, a breakup is a literal end of a relationship. You are breaking up with someone means you are ending your relationship with them.
Whether you broke up willingly, involuntarily or you had to break up because of some circumstances, it’s going to cause you pain. The pain might last a moment, a year, or a whole lifetime.
Break-ups are hard, and it’s even harder to cope with them.
Dealing with a breakup isn’t that easy as people say it is.
A person who goes through a breakup has to go through a lot of mental, physical, and psychological disturbance.
It depends upon person to person about how they deal with a breakup. However, in most cases, the situation is similar.
Some people get hurt so bad that they hurt themselves physically and even commit suicide.
Giving your life over someone isn’t a good idea because of your life worth much more than that.
People often get confused about what to do next, and they think ending their life would solve their problems.
Well, it will solve the issues for you, but what about those whom you leave behind: your family, your friends, and your entire personal life.
Do you even dare to think about what will happen to them? How much your death will shatter them? Suicide is not an option. It shouldn’t be.
Here, in this article, I have tried to explain some positive ways about how you can handle a breakup. The main motto of this site is to help you solve your relationship issues and problems. Contact us and be friends with us if you like. We are here to help you.
Yup, you can, can’t you?
Is there anything more important than your own body?
People usually think that if they hurt themselves physically, the physical pain will layer up the psychological one, and the breakup will hurt less.
Unfortunately, that doesn’t work. Might work for a moment but that’s not a long term solution.
Teen these days cut their hands with a blade, throw their health away, don’t eat for days, stay awake for weeks, and whatnot.
Come on, seriously? You think cutting your hand with a blade will solve your problem.
One day you will move on and trust me, you will, and that day you will regret it too much.
You will be in another relationship, but the scar on your hand will remain the same. So, never do such stupid things.
Eat properly. Sleep adequately. Do exercise daily and stay positive.
Stay focused on your life goal
You have seen a dream, haven’t you? A vision of living a better life. A healthy and prosperous life.
You have aimed to reach the moon and leave a mark in history. You have dreamed of achieving something big.
And what were you just about to do? You were going to commit suicide. Just because you had a breakup, you were going to leave everything behind that you have ever dreamed of.
Let me tell you a story to make you understand better about staying focus.
A friend of mine was in a relationship. He was doing well, and he was very happy.
Unfortunately, one day he got into a bike accident and got injured very seriously.
He had to take bed rest for a year. Can you imagine an entire year on a bed?
He was getting proper treatment in his home. His girlfriend used to visit him from time to time. His relationship was going fine until then.
A year passed, and now he could walk and go outside.
Being in a bed for a year, he had grown overweight.
He could walk, but it was getting complicated for him to walk correctly.
One day he went on a date with his girlfriend. He took her to a nice restaurant to have some good dinner and spend some quality time.
While they were ordering some food, a group of teens entered the restaurant. They looked at my friend and started mumbling and laughing.
Obviously, they were making fun of my friend’s body.
Meanwhile, a guy from the group stood up and said to my friend’s girlfriend, “Isn’t it getting heavy for you to carry such a huge sack bag?”
She got so embarrassed that she got up and went out.
My friend didn’t want to ruin his date, so he went out without saying anything to that guy.
Their date didn’t go as planned, so both of them headed towards home.
My friend called her to know if she reached home safely. But, she didn’t receive his call. He waited for a while and called her again. She didn’t receive it again.
He called her around ten times, but nope, she didn’t pick up the phone.
After a while, he received a message. It was from her, and it said “I am sorry, but I can’t be in a relationship with you anymore. What happened today made me realize that we are not made for each other. Please try to forget me. I am sorry.”
Can you imagine?
She broke up with my friend just like that over a text.
He tried to call her again and again. But she didn’t pick up her phone.
My friend got so devastated that for a moment, he even thought of committing suicide.
If you are reading this article, then you can relate to what he might have gone through.
His girlfriend broke up with him because she got embarrassed about having a “big-body-sized” boyfriend.
Yes, it was heartbreaking and painful.
He was going to ruin his life because of this breakup, but I didn’t let that happen.
The very next day, I took him to a Gym and booked him a subscription.
That was the day, and today is the day.
The guy, who used to weigh around 120 kg, has literally six pack abs now.
He is doing acting classes, and he has already got a role in a movie. He is doing absolutely fine now, and he is delighted with his life.
Are you still here? Are you following through?
The story was long, wasn’t it?
But, I had to tell you the story so that you could learn something.
So what did you learn?
Stay motivated and don’t let the breakup demoralize your value. Give your breakup a direction and work hard to achieve it.
Let’s move on to the next step about how to handle your breakup.
Spend time with your family and friends
Does any of your family member or a friend know about your breakup?
If they know, then it’s a good thing.
If they don’t, then I would like to suggest you share it with someone.
Sharing your feelings will help you ease your pain.
Spend time with your closed ones. Don’t lock yourself alone in a room.
I know you would want to stay alone but trust me it will hurt you more.
Go out with friends and share your feelings. Good friends won’t let you feel alone.
Try to build an ex-free environment
Now, what is an ex-free environment?
An ex-free environment is a place that you create to keep your ex out of your sight so that your ex could be out of your mind.
If you see your ex here and there daily, then it will be challenging for you to forget them.
How do you build an ex-free environment?
- 1st thing 1st. Delete their number from your phone.
- Erase your messages and conversation history.
- Likewise, block them from your social media accounts.
- Stop going to the places you used to go together if possible.
- Keep your mind occupied with things you like.
- Stay more in your comfort zone.
After being in an ex-free environment for a couple of weeks, it will get more comfortable for you to progress.
If you have thought of closing the door for good, then stop gazing through the windows
If you are sure, you have given a proper thought about getting separated, then let it happen for good.
Stop worrying about them and let them do whatever they want to do.
I know it’s hard just to let it go. You would still care about them. You would still want to know what’s happening in their life.
However, if you are really trying to deal with your breakup, then you have to learn to stop caring.
Meeting their family members or communicating with their friends even after the breakup won’t help you cope with it.
So, in that sense keep the windows closed too, along with the doors.
Move on to another relationship
If you have been in a relationship for more than a year, then it will be too much difficult for you to move on.
Most of the people these days get into another relationship soon after the breakup, just to make their ex jealous?
Does this trick work? I don’t think it works.
Has it ever worked for anyone? Did it work for you?
Write down below in the comment section and let me know.
If you were in a genuine relationship, then you wouldn’t think about moving on soon after the breakup.
Time heals pain, and I know it does.
I am not suggesting you get into a relationship with the next guy you meet.
Take your time. Do it on your own pace.
Be in the next relationship only when you think you are ready. Otherwise, you would be spoiling yours as well as the next person’s life.
Consult a therapist
Did you try all the ways mentioned above but still couldn’t handle your breakup?
I know it’s not easier to get over a breakup when you still love them.
Sometimes, things don’t go as planned. No matter how hard you try, you can’t let them go out of your life.
If you are going through such phase and getting physically as well as mentally ill, then I would suggest you get some medical attention.
Go and meet a therapist.
An experienced professional therapist will help you move on progressively.
Being in a relationship is a beautiful life experience.
Nevertheless, sometimes, you have to get out of that relationship for various reasons.
If you are breaking up because of geographical separation, then I would like to suggest you go and read another article about how to make a long-distance relationship work?
When you break up from a relationship, your life will never be the same. You need to learn about how to live your life without their presence. If there is a slight chance of getting back together, you should try to save your failing relationship.
Dealing with a breakup is hard.
No matter what never stop loving yourself and never stop dreaming about your future. Don’t let the relationship separation demotivate you.
Your friends and family will always be there for you. Seek their help. Stop worrying about the past and start thinking about the future.
Don’t let a breakup make you forget how to be in love again.
Buy The Time of Contempt: The Witcher, Book 2 on Amazon.